Turners Falls resident Kaitlyn John consciously chooses a grateful existence centered on healing herself and others. At age 44, the single mom has overcome significant obstacles and today runs a successful housecleaning business in addition to building a career as a massage therapist. It’s inspiring to learn about someone whose life has been marked by tragedies, yet who makes it a point to offer a helping hand.
Born and raised in Greenfield until age 11, Kaitlyn was impacted by several unfortunate family developments, and ended up living with a friend’s mother. “There, I felt safe and loved,” she said.
Yet her adolescence and young adulthood were often chaotic. On the day in 2003 that she learned she was pregnant with her first child, Kaitlyn, who was 22 at the time, was riding in a car that hit a utility pole. She suffered severe head trauma when she hit the windshield. In fact, her pregnancy was bookended by car accidents: in April of 2004, two days after baby Jordin arrived by emergency C-section, the child’s father was involved in an accident that left him paralyzed as a quadriplegic.
“My daughter and I basically moved into the Spaulding Rehabilitation Center to be with her dad,” said Kaitlyn.
Jordin’s father died following a two-year period of downward spiraling, after which Kaitlyn found herself spiraling, too. “I was put on pain meds after Jordin was born,” said Kaitlyn.
Discomfort following the C-section threw her for a loop, as did severe back pain resulting from an injury apparently caused by an epidural injection.
“I was a mess,” said Kaitlyn. “I didn’t even realize that the meds they gave me were opioids. I got hooked.”
She and the baby moved in with Kaitlyn’s mom, and later moved to subsidized housing. “I felt broken and lost,” admitted Kaitlyn. Her four-year opioid addiction led her down painful paths that included futile appeals for help, brushes with the law, and jail time.
“DCF (the Department of Children and Families) took my daughter, who went briefly into foster care,” said Kaitlyn. “I lost my health insurance. It was a terrible time.”
At one point, Kaitlyn granted her own father, Jordin’s grandfather, custody of the child. Despite many difficulties, Kaitlyn took advantage of tools she learned at a New Bedford recovery program.
“The program was designed to break you down and build you back up. But I already felt broken, so I learned pretty quickly,” she said. “Later, I transferred to the Beacon House in Greenfield.”
Therapy introduced her to tools like meditation, EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), and NVC (Nonviolent Communication). “I read a book about NVC cover-to-cover,” she said. “It changed my life. I’d never been taught to communicate effectively.”
Community involvement helped her process: “I volunteered at the Recover Project, as well as Stone Soup (community meal program). After nine months at Beacon House, I graduated from the program and gained visitation rights with my daughter. I had a Family Advocate as part of a women’s center and I participated in every sober event I could find, anything related to recovery. I was willing to do anything that might help me heal.”
Throughout her thirties, Kaitlyn worked a series of jobs, including house painting. She started a successful house cleaning business while continuing to put her life back together. At age 39, she had a second child, a boy named Alejandro. Disaster struck again when her son was a year and a half old.
“I broke my leg while trying to rescue my daughter’s cat,” said Kaitlyn. “I jumped a fence and fractured a bone.”
Faced with another injury, Kaitlyn knew to be cautious about pain meds. “I devoted myself to learning about alternative methods. I used self-massage and lymphatic drainage techniques to heal myself. The doctors couldn’t believe how fast I recovered. I was lucky that my mother and my daughter took over my cleaning jobs while I concentrated on healing.” Those challenges revealed a new path.
Inspired by the healing power of alternative methods, Kaitlyn enrolled in massage school while continuing to run her cleaning business, Cosmic Cleaning Solutions. In addition to those two career streams, Kaitlyn has embarked on a third: “I’ve just started (personal and life) coaching and am working with my first client.” She loves sharing her healing journey with others.
“There’s nothing wrong with seeking help, and it’s important to make friends while taking care not to relapse. I’m very strict in terms of who I allow close to me,” she said. “I urge people to volunteer somewhere safe, like the Recover Project. Boundaries are very important. There are certain people I simply would not bring into my home. I’ve learned to trust my intuition.”
Daughter Jordin, now 22, graduated last month from Russell Sage College. “I’m bursting with pride,” said Kaitlyn. “Jordin studied interior design and right out of college she already has a job.” Alejandro is four years old and loves going out on the bike path with his mom. “Every day feels like a reprieve,” said Kaitlyn. “I’ve been through things that could’ve destroyed me. But they didn’t. I got the help I needed, picked up the pieces, and kept my faith in God at the center. I made it. Now I want to pay it forward.”
Eveline MacDougall is a Greenfield-based artist, writer, musician and mom who can be reached at eveline@amandlachorus.org.