Enthusiasm radiates from Turners Falls resident Audrey Kaiser, 14, as she describes her interests: “I love pretty much anything that happens outdoors. Ultimate frisbee and soccer are super fun, and I want to try basketball. I’ve also done horseback riding for most of my life. I love, love, love horses. Outside is my favorite place to be.”
Clearly, Kaiser is a person on the go. Even while sitting in a porch rocker, her eyes shine and her hands move expressively as she speaks about her activities.
Yet she also knows how to use a meditative practice referred to as “sit spot” to bring calm and stillness to life’s busy flow. She’s in good company, in that the practice is introduced in numerous schools and programs in our region and throughout the nation.
A sit spot is a place that a participant visits on a regular basis, sitting quietly for a period of time ranging from 10 or 15 minutes to one or more hours depending on the person’s schedule and desires. While many people choose spots in nature and away from others, the practice is also possible in the suburbs or even the heart of a city.
The teens interviewed for this article learned of the concept through Wolf Tree Programs, a Montague-based organization seeking to foster children’s connection to nature while teaching leadership and team-building skills.
Kaiser, a lifelong homeschooler, has done the bulk of her learning outdoors. But she recently enrolled in “real school” for the first time, entering the ninth grade last fall at Four Rivers Charter Public School in Greenfield.
“We’re starting in-person school on April 26,” said Kaiser, “but so far, school has been completely online, except for two hours a week when we meet outdoors at the school.”
Lowering her voice, Kaiser added, “To be honest, all that screen time really sucks. My bedroom became my school, so when it’s time to sleep or hang out, I don’t even want to be in there. A place that’s supposed to be relaxing has become stressful.” Yet she likes all her teachers and appreciates the chance to learn in new ways.
“I’m both excited and nervous about in-person schooling,” Kaiser admitted. When asked about the lasting effects of the pandemic on teens, she said, “It hasn’t been easy to connect with people in real ways. It’s hard to get an authentic version of yourself across over social media.”
Pandemic-era stressors deeply impact young people who thrive on close companionships and new experiences in groups. “I’m glad I went into this crazy time knowing how to calm my mind,” Kaiser said. “That hasn’t always been easy for me. I have a very busy mind, and I need to move my body a lot.”
Kaiser’s introduction to the practice of having a sit spot “began with 15-minute sessions in the youngest (Wolf Tree Programs) group. As we got older, we worked up to 90-120 minutes. We were taught to wait and to listen. Then we’d come back together and share what we saw. I loved that part, too.”
She said the goal is “to notice what’s going on around us, but also within us. I get a chance to ask myself: what am I stressed out about? What’s making me anxious? Yet at the same time, I learn to shut out distractions and concerns.”
When Kaiser was 10 years old, she took up a challenge to do a sit spot for 100 days. “I went to the woods behind my house and sat for about 15 minutes a day. It was cool to see the progression — in nature and in myself.”
She sat still even in the pouring rain, and “noticed that everything looked bright green. I watched deer and squirrels go by. I felt proud of being able to sit there, no matter what. It’s been a big self-growth thing.”
When asked about the biggest challenge, Kaiser replied definitively: “Being cold can be really hard. But I learned that I can always find something positive. And the best part is, now I observe things differently. When a bunch of things are going on at once, I can focus on just one. I’m more able to ground myself, to accept how I feel, and let go of what I can’t control.”
Alexander Davidson Carroll, 17, another longtime homeschooler, also learned of the sit spot practice through Wolf Tree Programs.
The Montague Center resident explained “sit spot challenges,” which come about when kids are invited by mentors or peers to do the daily practice “for a week, a month, 100 days, or even 1,000 days.”
Davidson Carroll took on his first sit spot challenge when he was eight: 10 to 15 minutes a day for one week. “I heard about an older kid who did it for 1,000 days and then passed it to another teen. It’s like a relay, where the challenge is passed on.”
When he started taking classes at Greenfield Community College a couple of years ago, Davidson Carroll found himself spending less time outside and thought a long-term sit spot practice would give him a daily reason to connect with nature.
“I’m up to more than 600 days in a row,” he said proudly. “Usually, I sit in one spot near my house, but I even did it while traveling in Spain last year.”
He sits for at least 10 minutes, sometimes for up to an hour. “The longer I sit, the more I tend to experience. I don’t read or do other things you might do while sitting outside. Sometimes, if it’s really cold, I sing in order to get through it. But it’s like meditation, so my preference is to have as little distraction as possible.”
Like Kaiser, Davidson Carroll finds that cold temperatures can be the biggest challenge, but “I put on a lot of wool and march out. Sometimes when I’m really cold, I look at my watch a lot. But overcoming challenges is what makes the practice so rewarding.”
He finds he processes more thoughts in a longer session. “I notice myself cycling back through patterns of thought. And I’ll realize: this particular thought has come up five times now … it must be important.”
He used to set a timer but now finds that his internal clock clicks in. In describing his practice, he said, “First, I arrive — there’s a nice rock I like to sit on. I do my sit spot at night, so I allow my eyes to adjust to the dark. I look around and start by breathing in all that’s around me while trying not to hyper-focus. I dull my eyesight and start to listen to the little goings-on in nature.”
Davidson Carroll added, “The goal is to be still, which can lead to birds getting used to me and coming close.”
Sometimes, he goes to his sit spot as the result of an upset, “especially during the pandemic, like if I’ve been looking at a screen too long and need a reset. It’s also just a nice way for me to end the day and leave activity behind. I find the trees are in the same places, and overhead are the same stars. No matter how bad the day was, the world is still here.”
In addition to persevering despite cold, wind, rain, heat, insects and the rigors of a demanding personal and academic schedule, Davidson Carroll has gone to his sit spot while feeling lousy.
“One day, I went with a fever of 103. My head hurt really badly but I stuck with it, knowing it would be memorable. My mom wasn’t so happy about me doing it that day, but I was proud to be committed enough to do it.”
Initially, he went to his sit spot during the day, but “started doing it at night and discovered how afraid I was of being in the dark woods. Now I’ve gotten so used to it, I don’t even take a flashlight with me.”
Davidson Carroll’s goal is to complete the challenge of 1,000 consecutive days, “but I’ll probably keep going. Now I feel like I can’t not do it. But maybe when I get to 1,000, I’ll pick a different spot.”
Davidson Carroll also meditates at home each morning. “I close my eyes and focus on the feeling of breath going in and out of my nose. I practice choosing whether to follow a thought.”
He began meditating at age 12 after attending an event with members of his family. “We went to hear a monk speak and I felt inspired. I started looking into books and guides about meditation.”
Davidson Carroll finds that meditation has practical applications. “During a sports game, if things aren’t going well, I can use my breath to reset. I’ve done that with soccer, basketball, ultimate frisbee, even rock climbing. Meditation has far-reaching roots in my life.”
Both morning meditation and nighttime sit spot times help him stay centered as he navigates his studies. “At GCC, I’ve been studying art, calculus, and other things. I’m also taking a Holyoke Community College class about the history of prisons and punishment in the U.S. and around the world.”
His younger sister, Solena, 14, started doing her own sit spot challenge last year, hoping to complete 100 days. When she reached her goal, she kept going, “stopping at the end of December,” she said. “I did almost 300 days.”
She said it helps her “feel clearer and gives me a better sense of things. My sit spot became a calm place where I could go when I was angry or sad. I’d go there feeling one way, and leave feeling better.”
Also a homeschooler, Solena Davidson Carroll takes classes online during the pandemic through various programs, currently focusing on philosophy, history and writing. She’s also a counselor-in-training with Wolf Tree Programs.
Her brother addressed what it’s like to be a teen during this era of change and crises: “I’ve had a lot of good moments despite the craziness of the pandemic and everything else that’s going on. But it’s important for me to have ways to stay centered.”
Social media, he says, is a blessing and a curse. “With the constant dissemination of news, stuff is popping up all the time, including stuff we don’t want to see or can’t do anything about. Yet the interconnectedness can also be great as we offer mutual aid and rally around important issues.”
Admitting to being “sometimes very scared and sometimes very optimistic,” he concluded by saying, “I’m an activist at a time when things are intense, yet at the same time, I want to enjoy our world. Knowing how to stay calm really helps.”
Eveline MacDougall is an author, musician, artist and homeschooling mom. She welcomes feedback at eveline@amandlachorus.org.