Good morning!
My friend John Kennedy thinks I’m too hard on UMass athletic director Ryan Bamford. True, Bamford deserves credit for overseeing successful men’s and women’s soccer teams and the field hockey team that reached the NCAA Final Four and, says Kennedy,  “There are things Ryan has done that don’t appear on the scoreboard.”

Yet the football team will likely be 2-10 by day’s end and the basketball team has lost five of its first seven games. Moreover, fans feel Bamford was cruel and vindictive the way he fired coach Don Brown with two games left in his head coaching career. 

Bamford said this week that Brown was axed early in order to get a head start on finding a new coach. Using his usual Kamala Harris-like word salad, Bamford spoke of “coaching candidate pools… having appropriate conversations… [and] the opportunity to position our job against other jobs in the market.”

Bamford and his hiring agency don’t have a great track record. After Mark Whipple was fired, Bamford chose Walt Bell whom he called “a fantastic coach with tremendous credentials as a recruiter and developer of talent, a teacher, a motivator, an ambassador…”

Bell turned out to be the worst coach in college football history. He won two games in three years — or almost three years. Bamford fired him with three games left so he could hire Don Brown, and how’d that work out?

Here’s the deal. UMass is the worst program in FBS football. The new coach and the players he recruits will be here because they have no place else to go.

It’s sad that the state university hasn’t had a sniff of a bowl game in its 12-year existence. No pageantry, no school spirit, no ESPN game day experience, nada.

If Bamford’s not to blame for that these last nine years, then who is?

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The Mike Cadran MIAA Report: “Only two schools from Western Mass. won a fall tournament, the Longmeadow boys cross country team won the D-2 title and Pope Francis won the D-2 golf tourney.” 

Cadran added that 112 of the 273 high school football teams in the state made the playoffs. “None from our area made the finals. Springfield Central was really the only team with any chance, and they were upset.”  

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NHL analyst Paul Bissonnette paid the price for coming to the aid of an assistant manager at Houston’s, a family restaurant in Scottsdale on Sunday evening. Bissonnette told his story on Tuesday’s episode of “Spittin’ Chiclets,” saying he was minding his business when he noticed that several men were hassling management after being refused drinks. 

“They don’t serve in that part of the restaurant and one of them started putting his finger in the manager’s face and that’s when I went over to help him,” said Bissonnette.

Fists started flying and Bissonnette fought them off alone while he backed out of the restaurant. “They were seeing red,” he said. “Four of them got me on the ground, kicked me once in the neck and twice in the head. I’m just glad I didn’t get KO’d on the ground, they probably just would’ve boot-f***** my head off.”

Finally he was able to get up and run into a CVS. “The lady told me I couldn’t be there and I said, ‘There’s four hyenas outside trying to kill me!’” 

Someone in the restaurant had called 911, and the police arrived in time to arrest them and throw them in jail. TMZ released their mug shots, and they look like the cast from Peaky Blinders. Taking on one would’ve been a chore, let alone all six.

Bissonnette’s valor earned him an ambulance trip to the hospital.

“I know I’m in rough shape. I want to thank all the police officers, the ambulance and firemen who came over and checked my vitals.”

The 39-year-old Ontarian is a hockey lifer who played mostly in the AHL but also the NHL where he racked up 310 penalty minutes in 187 games with the Phoenix Coyotes.

“I’ll get their names boys, and this is going to be a thing, I’ll go after every single one of those f****. I would be willing to waive every single charge if I could go behind a barn somewhere and go one-v-one. I want my vengeance.”

Tennis, anyone?

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The Bastards of Boston Baseball podcast is composed of diehard wanna-be GMs. It’s a good listen when they stick to baseball, but the rich guy who talks about his trips to Bora Bora and  watching the Dodgers in “La La Land” is a bora bora.

The need for improvement begins on the mound where Brayan Bello, Kutter Crawford, Tanner Houck, Nick Pivetta and Cooper Criswell were a combined 44-51 this season. “They can’t go into next year with the same rotation they have now,” said Jason Kelly. “They just can’t.”

Left-handed starters are at a premium. Blake Snell signed with the Dodgers this week, leaving Atlanta’s Max Fried (11-10; 3.25 ERA) and 36-year-old Jose Quintana who was 10-10 for the Mets this year. They’d love the Red Sox to trade for 6-foot-6 southpaw Garrett Crochet from the White Sox but fear it’ll cost the team a top prospect out of the farm system. 

Free agent right-handers include Walker Buehler of the Dodgers (47-22; 3.27), and Corbin Burnes who was 15-6 with a 2.92 ERA for the Orioles this season.

Free agent southpaw relievers include 38-year-old Kirby Yates who was 7-2 with a 1.17 ERA with 33 saves for the Rangers, and Tanner Scott who had 22 saves for the Marlins and Padres.

Burnes has met with the Red Sox but MLB Insider reports the leading contenders for his services are the Orioles and of course the Dodgers who seem to be building a dynasty comparable to the 1950s Yankees.

During this week’s roundtable they discussed moving Rafael Devers from third base to first base and acquiring either Nolan Arenado from St. Louis or free agent Alex Bregman to play the hot corner. Jeremy Schilling said he’d pay for “psychopath” Tristan Casas’s Uber fare to the airport and bring in Paul Goldschmidt to play at first.

They know the only player who’s a game changer is Juan Soto. The shock value of getting the 26-year-old lefthanded hitter to play right field would be akin to getting Pedro Martinez, Manny Ramirez or Curt Schilling. “We’re back in business,” Dan Duquette said after he landed Martinez from the Expos in 1998.

The Red Sox averaged 92 wins and made the playoffs six times during the decade when at least one of the aforementioned was on the team. Likewise, Soto would lift them out of their 79-win funk the last three seasons.

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SQUIBBERS: UMass hockey hosted Army yesterday, and West Point grad Terry Kennedy of Amherst noted, “It’s the end of a 75-year run of Riley coaches when Brian retires after this year. He was on double runners when I played for his dad Jack Riley.” … Longtime Jets fan Joe Benigno uttered an inconvenient truth during his weekly show on WFAN: “The media, let’s be honest OK? Let’s tell it like it is here. The media that covers the Jets does not want them to win. It’s a better story if they continue their clown show persona.” … In case you missed it, Idaho beat Idaho State, 40-17, on Saturday night to win the Potato Trophy in Pocatello. … Freshman tight end Luke Reynolds of Westford ran a fake punt for 38 yards on Saturday, the key play in Penn State’s 26-25 win over Minnesota. … Jason Varitek will serve as Boston’s game planning and run prevention coach this season. …  The Daily Reprieve’s Tom Murphy quotes Notre Dame’s Frank Leahy to push back on those who think football’s only about X’s and O’s. “Egotism,” said Leahy, “is the anesthetic that dulls the pain of stupidity.” ... Stash says the Powertown would’ve topped GHS on Turkey Day. No doubt in his mind

Chip Ainsworth is an award-winning columnist who has penned his observations about sports for decades in the Pioneer Valley. He can be reached at chipjet715@icloud.com