Unsubstantiated rumors are swirling that Democratic presidential candidate Joe Biden has been unmasked and positively identified as “The Dude.” Not just any dude, but THE Dude — a hipster mystic first represented in human form by actor Jeff Bridges in the 1998 film, The Big Lebowski. The movie’s cult following also spawned a religion known as “Dude-ism” now numbering over 450,000 ordained Dudeist priests dedicated to interpreting the script(ure)-writing Coen brothers’ gospel of slacker-dom.
Could Biden, however improbably, be the hipster messiah? Swing states may get swung on that question.
Lacking a Dudeist Vatican Council, disorganized clusters of the faithful are now contending over whether Biden is, in fact, The Dude. Central to Dudeism is the creedal assertion, “the Dude abides.” Some claim “the Dude is abidin’ ” is true Dudeist orthodoxy, ergo Joe Biden is The Dude!
Dudeist doubters, who regard this as mere linguistic legerdemain, are compiling hard evidence of Biden’s abiding Dudeness. Forty-seven years of (abiding) public service — check. Basement-centered campaigning revealing Biden as a fully realized slacker politician — check. And yet, convincing signs are needed to confer the mantle of El Duderino.
One oft-cited parable is Biden’s Primary debate exhortation to “play more records to your children.” Where most heard only a random anachronistic gaffe, keen Dudeist ears picked up a hi-fi signal more piercing than any dog whistle. One notes, “Biden may not be all in on the Green New Deal but check it out — the dude spins vinyl!” For many a Dudeist — pure epiphany.
But messianic claims can make for messy politics. Mainstream adherents have long considered Biden to be The Man (an honorific also hurled back like a tear gas canister by restive Sandersistas). Democratic strategists have thus far sought to play down Biden’s unmistakable “Dudeness,” perhaps in deference to the vanguard of Black women who decisively surged Biden to victory in key Southern primaries. They might roll their collective eyes at the thought of having to join forces with over-cannabinated slackers in order to flip the Senate and achieve meaningful policy wins on health care, green jobs, voting reforms and racial justice.
Trump, however, may have inadvertently rousted thousands of slacker “sleeper cells” to Biden’s side of the political bed with his incessant “Sleepy Joe” catcalls. While only a small radicalized cohort of the insufferably hip can recite The Big Lebowski chapter and verse, the Slacker-American community writ large is estimated to include nearly 40% of all eligible voters. This sleepy seldom-voting gargantuan might just rise, on Oct. 31, and stagger zombie-like toward the polls.
Can Biden unite the somnolent and the “woke” wings of his sprawling coalition in time for the actual election on Nov. 3? The emerging consensus among both Dudeist and secular analysts is that whatever his shortcomings, Biden “kinda ties the room together.”
But don’t bet on the notoriously unreliable Slacker-American vote to tip the balance in key swing states. If you count yourself among the merely sleep-deprived majority, get out and vote! Get that ballot in early! And when you do, be of good cheer and spread the good news — the Dude is a Biden!
Andrew Baker, of Shelburne Falls, has impeccable slacker credentials as the founder of a volunteer-run movie theater dedicated to reviving the best classic and indie films, including “The Big Lebowski.” Pothole Pictures in Shelburne Falls is curr ently celebrating its 25 years in business slacker-style by closing down for the COVID pause.