Dear kids,
Santa is wondering why none of you have responded to the email sent last week, the one in which Santa asked, “Who’s coming home for Christmas this year?”
Santa needs to know this for a few reasons. First of all, if Santa has to send presents, Santa needs time to make lightweight gifts that are inexpensive to ship. Also, for those not coming home, Santa is considering nixing their stockings. Do you three realize just how time-consuming stockings are? And, as Santa grew up in a family of Jews, this whole stocking thing has come way out of left field. Knocking off a stocking or two this year would not make Santa sad. What would make him sad is if this is the year Santa has been dreading, the one where all of you don’t come home.
Santa understands that life goes on, that you are supposed to grow up, decorate your own trees, hang your own stockings, even dress-up Santa’s grand-dogs, but it’s going to be disheartening if not one of you are home. Who will leave Santa a note? Toll House cookies? A frosty mug of craft-brewed beer?
On the other hand, and Santa has been doing a lot of thinking on this, if only one of the kids were to come home, that might not sit well either. Just one child at home with disappointed, but trying-so-hard-not-to-look-disappointed, parents might be unbearable as well. Not to discourage those of you who might be able to come home, but perhaps more of you could find a way. You might want to call in favors, put screws to a fence sitting sibling. You might want to threaten to tell the parents about the party you all threw that weekend your parents went away. Use a little blackmail to encourage that fence sitting sibling to climb on board the let’s-all-go-home-for-Christmas sleigh.
Santa hates to say this, but perhaps this Christmas will be the Christmas none of you come home. Picture it, those Christmas Eve latkes, those tip of the cap pancakes to Santa’s Jewish heritage, those latkes may go un-fried. And the tree, usually overflowing with gifts, well that may look more like a picked over, second-day tag sale. And the waffles made from scratch every Christmas morning, not happening. The Christmas dinner, prepared begrudgingly because Santa hates to cook, that meal may not materialize either. Still, it’s one thing for Santa to resent having to cook Christmas dinner but do it anyway, and it’s another thing to actually not cook Christmas dinner.
Maybe Santa and his favorite elf, the one with a bit of gray in his mustache, should just go to Hawaii. Maybe this is the year to have some fun in the sun at Christmas instead of frost nip in New England.
But back to the original query. The lack of response to the aforementioned email has Santa concerned. Santa doesn’t mean to guilt trip you, but an empty Christmas nest will be very hard for Santa. No matter how old you get, you will always be Santa’s kids.
And forget Skype! Don’t even mention Skyping to Santa! Faces on screens are not live bodies. Santa hopes you know that the bottom line is that Santa’s love has no reins attached. Santa will find a way to heal and deal. Santa always finds a way.
Nancy Smith lives in Ashfield and has three grown kids and one wonderful husband. Follow her blog at www.midlifelitter.blogspot.com Love and Kisses, You know who.