“Power” is … a powerful word. It signifies strength and conveys a sense of being able to make things happen. According to a typical dictionary definition, power means “the ability to do something or act in a particular way, especially as a faculty or quality … the capacity or ability to direct or influence the behavior of others or the course of events.”
Like so much else, power exists on a continuum, and may be used constructively or destructively by those who aspire or cling to it. I see two essential — and oppositional — ways of looking at power. We see and experience all manner of abusive and cohesive power in action every day.
One version of power that we witness and read about daily in our city and beyond is a conventional abuse of power. I call this “power over.” This is a deliberate (and sometimes desperate) effort to build and maintain a status quo of holding power over others in order to convey dominance, distancing, and control. A quick scan through any form of print or visual news media highlights stories of this type of destructive power, no matter one’s political affiliation. Power over is a concerted effort to (re)establish what’s known as a “power asymmetry” that enables those with access to power to continue to use it to diminish others without equal access. It is often based on the appearance of two components: ignorance and fear of others.
A second form of power is a more collaborative and connected sense of its use, one that I think of as “power with.” This type of power is less dominating and controlling. It involves the effective use of critical skills such as respectful listening and questioning, cooperation, collaboration, reflection, and teamwork. Sadly, we don’t see as many examples of this in the news media as much as we do actions involving “power over.” Thankfully, here in Greenfield, we witness daily reminders and events that engage our citizenry, our civic workers, and volunteers throughout our communities working collaboratively within a “power with” framework. At its best, we feel elevated and inspired to experience “power with.” When we sense “power with” situations we feel engaged and included, and with these feelings, we often feel heard and met.
A subset of this kind of power is “power within.” This has to do with an outward manifestation of self-regulation, personal discipline, and personal characteristics displaying emotional and social intelligence.
To be sure, the executive branch of our local government — as with most governments the world over — could learn, then use, greater “people skills,” better awareness of emotional and social intelligence, wisdom and thoughtfulness, and a greater sense of care and respect — to build our community using a “power with” approach. For many if not most of us, this would be preferred rather than the top-down, holier-than-thou haphazard attempts to control and even silence voices of difference.
Rather than re-hash the details of the past few years as they have played out in the city of Greenfield, what seems more important is that, in its most genuine form, “power with” enables us as individuals to engage in the constructive use of our voices and our votes. We get to make choices as to how we want to see power conveyed and utilized. This brings me to something that is so vital in our world today: hope. And I hope Greenfield, in the coming elections just six months away, will move ever closer to “power with” rather than “power over.”
I believe most of us, as peace-loving people, seek to connect with others to share ourselves in a mutually beneficial manner. This means slowing ourselves down enough to be able to think, listen, and respond to the words and thoughts of others in ways that are respectful and reciprocal. To me, this means asking the biggest, shortest, best question of all-time, one that requires de-centering from self, at least a partial removal of ego, and a caring heart, patient enough to both ask and take in whatever response may be forthcoming. “… Is there more …?” Power with enables us to get into alignment and connection with another, whether there is agreement or disagreement forthcoming. How often do we see this in today’s politics — local or beyond?
When we experience “power with,” we feel included, not isolated. We sense that we belong, not that we are being dissed or dismissed. When our ideas are considered by others, we naturally become engaged and feel welcomed. We cannot afford our lives and livelihood to take place otherwise.
Try asking someone — especially someone you don’t know well – “Is there more?” and see what happens. My educated guess tells me something good will come of this if you are asking with sincerity and allowing time and your listening skills to take in the response. This may well lead to the building of trust, safety, and connection. And, in all this goodness lies the kernel of the constructive use of power. We each can build from this seed.
Let’s decide to use our constructive voices, ideas, and energies to build our lives and our community with a “power with” approach and unburden ourselves of the thoughts and the actions of those insistent upon using a “power over” approach. Greenfield and the world-writ-large will be the better off at a time when this is of vital importance.
Daniel Cantor Yalowitz is a new columnist whose writings will appear every other week in the Recorder. A developmental and intercultural psychologist, he has facilitated change in many organizations and communities around the world. He is former chairman of the Greenfield Human Rights Commission and committed to building and aligning communities with respect and integrity. Reach out to him at danielcyalowitz@gmail.com.